Follow up- "Not So Much Messy"

Just to follow up with the previous "be afraid" post.

My daughter actually said she wants to go live at our friend's house because "it's not so much messy as ours."

Ya think?

I explained to her that the reason our house is so messy is largely due to her making it that way and/or the fact that I never have time to clean because I am busy being a fabulous mother.

She wasn't quite buying it.

I know things will always be chaotic with 3 kids. My sister in law has 3 boys and there were times (before I had kids) that I wanted to go running and screaming from her house. Most times we went there, in fact. But 3+ small kids who are relatively close in their developmental needs, stages and curiosities is freaking crazy hard. I have a new respect for preschool and kindergarten teachers, I have no idea how they do it & keep it together.

Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid

As my blog has been focused on my working life recently, I decided I need to update on some kid issues.

We went to a friend's house for dinner last night. A friend who has only one child and the father was an only child. I knew (from their recent visit here) that it was going to be an interesting evening. When we had them over, I could tell the father was completely freaked out by the level of chaos and insanity that my children present on a minute by minute basis. When they invited us over, I felt like telling them "Be afraid, be very afraid."

(By the way, adore the mom. She had twin sisters 2 years younger than herself, so she "gets it" more than most).

So yeah. Their house. Perfect. Shiny surfaces, beautiful hardwood floors, like a Pottery Barn catalog. Daughter's room neat as a pin, clothes folded orderly in drawers. Honestly, I try to fold the kids clothes in an orderly fashion, but sort of gave up on all of that a while ago. Now, if the clothes get washed and end up in the correct drawer, I'm ahead of the game.

The husband has his own sort of media room. He's very into music, much like my husband, so they have that in common. That is where the similarity ends, though. As I walked by that room, viewing the piles of CD's, no doubt categorized by group, issue date, genre and god knows what else, I thought "You may want to close that door."

After the kids finished dinner, which they did actually do quite well with, they started to do what they do, get back to the business of play and tearing things up. The dad mentioned that we might want to wipe their hands.

I had to stifle a laugh.

That's not to say that I don't clean my kids up, I do. I'm always changing after them with wipies or wet paper towels. But I just found his anxiety level surrounding my children's sticky little hands quite humorous.

At one point, play dough was brought out. I just knew this was all kinds of a bad idea. My kids don't respect the whole keeping each color separate. In the end, there were pieces of play dough all over the floor and the play dough was smooshed together into some sort of purplish blob.

I felt bad, but I sort of saw that one coming. Play dough = bad scene. Crayons came out. Fortunately, none were broken, no walls or furniture was written on.

I spent most of the evening, cleaning up after my children, feeling slightly embarassed, but then again, they knew what they were getting into when they put forth the invite. As I said, the mom completely gets it. She's a sweetheart and always reassures me that she understands.

I am not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way, we became "that family." I own it, embrace it and try to remember that it won't always be this way. I think my expectations are pretty realistic, considering they are 2 year old boys and all, but sometimes I just think "How did I end up with Tazmanian devils as children?"

I will look back on these days longingly someday, I am told by people older and wiser. I am not so sure about that, but I'll take their word on it.

"Fiscal Services, this is Melissa"

I'm not going to lie. I'm tired.

I haven't worked 40 hours since 2005. It was not easy getting up Thursday and Friday and going to work ALL DAY. (Those were typically my off day and late day). It was hard to know that Wednesday was not my Friday anymore. *sniff sniff*

Then again, when I'm enjoying the whole week off for President's day, it'll all be worth it. :)

It's my own fault, I've been staying up too late in the evenings. I need to get more sleep. The kids have been sick, I've been trying to keep it all together. Sofia did point out that I get home when it's still light out and "we are able to go to the park" - which we did on Wednesday.

While the 2 minute commute is wonderful, I do only take a half hour lunch (to get off at 4) so I'm finding that on the days the kids are home with Steve, it's only upsetting to them for me to run in for 15-20 minutes, try to eat and give them attention at the same time. It's just better that I don't come home for lunch on those days.

I'm still obviously trying to figure all of this stuff out.

I am very much liking my co-workers. That said, they are hard core locals and can be a bit gossipy. With the whole coastal setting/Portugese element, at times I feel like I've walked into the movie Mystic Pizza.

Most of my peers are not big fans of Mr. Superintendent who almost hired me and it's now becoming very clear why he wanted an external candidate as his right hand. The woman who beat me out for the job had only been in the department for one year. As there were "7 internal candidates vying for the position," I can assume that everyone I work with was vying for the position. This being a very close knit, gossipy bunch, I can also assume that some know I was one of the finalists. The superintendent seems relatively nice and normal to me, but he came in in 2008, the year of the massive budget cuts. He is viewed as the bad guy. Maybe I'll view him that way as well when it's decided to cut my job (it's looking like they won't have any choice. A parcel tax is on the table, but I think they are still going to have to make cuts).

I can see there is a clear distinction between management and the classified employees. I just try to be nice to everyone and not partake in the gossip. I did join my first football pool and am now excited to have a reason to watch the Superbowl!

I'm learning more new things every day and that is great. The fiscal environment (my new favorite word - "Fiscal Services, this is Melissa, Fiscal Services, this is Melissa" and "Fiscal Year" are said at least 17 times a day) is exactly what my resume needs, so I'm just taking it one day at a time and trying to soak it all in.

Just like a little sponge. :p

Day 3 of My New World

Where to start.

Yesterday, I met the woman who does Payroll (she was out Monday). She has a little girl Sofia's age and is pregnant with a girl, due in May. She seemed very sweet and helpful, so that was good. Today, we got to chatting and I found out she's a native, born and bred in this small town. She then went on to tell me that she had 2 boys, but they died. I didn't quite know what to say and then she showed me their picture. They were 3 and 2 when they died in 2004. They died in a fire.

I cannot even imagine. Can't even imagine.

She wasn't awkward about it, but just explained that most people know about what happened and she usually just tells people so they know. She has sort of a shrine to them in her office, surrounding a photo of them with Santa.

When I mentioned it to Steve, he said he remembered hearing about it. Read about it in the papers. How incredibly awful.

I've now done all sorts of googling and found out much more. Apparently, the authorities thought the father (her husband at the time, she is now remarried) intentionally set the fire. Meth was found in his system. He was sentenced to 3 years in prison in a plea bargain. He had originally been charged with murder and arson, but it was reduced to involuntary manslaughter.

Wow. Just. Wow.

My heart breaks for her. After reading the articles, she had been at work when the fire happened.

I am quite certain she is carrying around an unimaginable amount of grief, but she does not show it. Granted, I've only known her 2 days, but I am quite struck by how normal she seems after all of it. When I expressed my condolences (I mean, what do you say when someone tells you something like this? There are no right words) she just kind of shrugged and said "You just have to move on" or something like that.

I don't know if I could move on. It really got me thinking. I guess you just sort of do because...well, what other options are there?

***

Apparently, in this world I now inhabit, audits are frequent. Right now, the district is being audited by the organization that manages the retirement system and they have had their auditors, plus 2 external auditors on site. My boss had them set up in the middle of the department, no conference room for them. She said she likes to keep auditors close.

So, I have spent the past 2 days listening to all the minutiae of what they are looking at, what they need from my boss and HR, going back and forth about this and that and going back some more. It's quite humorous for me to listen to all of these anal, control freak, number cruncher types all sort of politely arguing and exchanging information. I'm like a little fly on the wall.

Some things I have observed.

My boss does not like to be wrong.

My boss is very smart.

My boss works very hard.

My boss likes to defer a lot to HR whenever possible.

My boss is a very good mentor and teacher.

Many people at the district wear jeans every day. Hard for me to wrap my head around that one. I am barely a jeans type of girl outside of work, let alone at work.

The other employees (payroll, accounting) in the department are very intimidated by my boss. I'm sure there is good reason for that, which I hope not to see anytime soon. They visibly relax when she is not around, tense up when she returns.

One of the auditors needed an answer on something and my boss was not around. I gave him the best answer I had at the time. The girl in payroll concurred and whispered to me "When XXX gets back, tell her I told you to tell them that." She was trying to cover for me and I thought that was very nice of her. Turns out, what I had told them was correct.

Every day, I learn new things and I've been poking around in my files & drawers in downtime, reading them, soaking in the information. In many of them, there are instructions and notes of prior employees, so that has been really helpful.

So far so good. Obviously, working 5 days is harder for me than working 3.5, but I was able to come home from work tonight and take the kids to the park. Can't beat that.

Sofia and David have really bad coughs. We are supposed to go out tomorrow night, but I'm not sure if that's going to happen. We shall see.

TPS Reports & Such

So, I survived my first day.

It wasn't bad. In fact, it was fairly low key. I know that people are holding back a bit because I am new and all that, so the real test will be found in the next few weeks. Still, I had an overview of most of my responsibilities and nothing screamed out at me as something I'm not capable of. It's just going to be a matter of learning the new "language," software and protocols. There are many policies, procedures and protocols, not to mention acronyms. Oh the educators LOVE their acronyms.

I kept waiting for someone to ask me for the TPS reports (that's an Office Space reference, in case you missed it) but no one did. I mean, who would know that ADA means Americans with Disabilities Act AND Average Daily Attendance? Educators, that's who! I will get all of this, it's just going to take time.

There is much data to be logged, sorted, exported, journaled & strung. I never saw myself as someone immersed in data, but there it is. In some ways, the department is very tech savvy, in many ways, it's still very antiquated. There are many binders and logging things by hand, for instance. Adding machines with paper receipts. Papers with triplicate carbons. The copy machine is seriously high tech, though and I have to admit, until I have my first official run in with it and see what it's made of, I'll hold off on making any commentary. There is a massive postage meter that can do almost anything you ask it to and I need to become one with that as well. Fun, fun, fun!

The department I'm working in is fairly quiet, (number crunchers department) but there is much to do once I get more assimilated. I get to start at 7:30 and leave at 4 (yey)! I don't have a cube, but am in a little cove with a very desk, large workspace and new computer. And a window too! No complaints here.

The best part of today? My 2 MINUTE FREAKING COMMUTE! Oh yeah. Mama like.